I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
and being hungover still at 4 in the afternoon is NOT "having allergies"
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
We got baked and watched the cheetah girls on Netflix
You need to not admit that.
I would fuck him In a heartbeat, an obese child running up stairs with an irregular heartbeat, heartbeat.
Definitely thought about throwing up in the cat box since it's not as far to the bathroom..
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
Just had a flashback of scottish man yellin' at my face. What the fuck I did?
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize
