Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
Just found a shot glass and plan b in my backpack...
Im guessing the shot glass is for plan c?
They poked me and kept screaming "LAUGH DOUGH BOY" it's like 3rd grade all over again.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
you riverdanced for the cops while the rest ran away.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
It started as ''I want a romantic life right now'' text. It ended with pool table sex.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
I'm getting married
To pizza
HE FINALLY TEXT ME AND CALLED ME BY MY TWITTER NAME STAND BY FOR THE WEDDING INVITE, BRIDESMAID
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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