the next pure michigan commercial i see, i am going to pee in a fucking lake
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
How is it that you get into at least one taco related fight a year?
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
She brought over her portable harddrive and we dueled with porn. This relationship is too beautiful to last.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sloppy and selfish. Your 27 and you don't know where my clit is? BYEEE
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
Sigh. I'll find the right guy one day.
Prince charming is right around the corner and will be freaky as shit!
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
sometimes i like to lay one the floor and pretend im a carrot.
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