You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
Just got head while drinking hot cocoa and eating cookies. Never in my life have I felt more like santa claus
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
Do you know how hard it is to get cum out of a straw hat!?
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
It's not really the holidays until I raid the medicine cabinet. Happy hydrocodone to me
And a merry methadone to all
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
FINALLY GOT MY TENTH DICK. PARTY FOREVER
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
Randomize
