xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
if i see another status about New Moon, i'm gonna punch a baby
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
You do realize that we bought beer at 9:30 in the morning to avoid sobering up. Stupidity was bound to follow.
just looked in the mirror, I fell asleep with a face mask on. At least drunk me cares that much about the condition of my skin
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
He apologized for cumming on my leg, but not for ghosting me for 3 weeks before :(
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
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