go do what you do best...puke behind churches
If I were a woman I'd fill my water bra with liquor so that I could sip on it throughout the day.
i made sure i dropped the whole "im a yoga teacher" bomb which basically roofies a guys sense of judgement and guarantees he will sleep with me.
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did you seriously make the punch out of vodka and food coloring
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
I can't believe you big bird do not remember battling a shark last night it turned into a Pokemon battle and big bird over powered the shark
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I believe in your delicious
I'm sorry I tried to stab you. I just really wanted those mozerella sticks.
So you thought it was a good idea to make plans for the same time same place with the guy you were sort of dating AND his best friend you slept with?
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
I need more 20 something year old penis in my life
Randomize