Did I ever tell you that the first person i made out with cried?
Got bored today and made list of places in apt I want to have sex. One includes opening and coming out the window.
If I die, please delete the word file entitled "Rainy Day"
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
She wants me to spank her and yell "Kerry! Your father is disappointed with your choices!" Fuck up but crazy hot? Or just fuck up crazy?
The guy who just got ate on True Blood had the same balls as you.
Sorry I drunkenly insulted your air mattress last night. You still could have fucked me on it though.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
I was very impressed with his ability to carry on a conversation with his friends sitting in the front seat with his hand in my pants, getting a hand job, stoned, with a cigarette in his mouth. I think he's a keeper.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
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