just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
I wish there was a non-hangover washing machine that I could stick myself in right now
sounds like you fell off the wagon.
fuck falling off. at this point, the wagon is a dot on the horizon.
on a side note you can NOT make bong water out of a pear
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Was I really yelling "girls night" at random chicks before stealing and drinking all their shots?
he got mad becuase i made more noise when he gave me a back massage then i do when we actually have sex
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
"Being an adult" and "being happy" are two circles that do not overlap in my Venn diagram of life.
she chased shots of jack with a fucking steak. i'm in love.
I'm not sure you count what happened last night as sex.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
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