i just puked in front of my entire floor a girl on crutches asked iof i needed help hahaaa fuck ima damn fool
i told her parents not too worry the way i do it girls dont get pregnant
My new excuse for sleeping with him was in celebration of his cat's birthday.
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I think i smell like relationship. That's my problem.
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
Fuck that. I will get OUT of CONTROL And rise from a hangover on Sunday like Jesus himself.
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
I'm gonna adopt her diet plan of secretly sleeping w a desperate ex... It combines excersise & loss of appetite due to guilt
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