So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
He's so gross, but the preschooler inside me is screaming that this is her life dream and I have to be with him or she'll never forgive me.
whatever happens this semester dont let me be that girl yacking in the urinal. again.
It's only been a week and i've already broken my no summer randoms rule twice.
How many layers of skin can you loose before it becomes bad?
i like feelif swiord YOU ARE A GOD
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
Best case scenario I do a bunch of dirty things to you, blow your mind and you enjoy it. Worst case I stare at you, poke at you, smile and droll on myself, you laugh.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
all I got out of honors convocation is I've hooked up with a lot of smart guys
sorry didn’t mean to call you, i was just trying to put the t-rex emoji beside your name
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
