The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
A 20 minute car ride back to your car with the girl u had drunk anal with is the most uncomfortable thing ever.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
She seems less like a roommate, and more like a homeless person who snuck into your apartment.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
the night literally screamed "cock and ball torture"
Between his smile and monumental dick even the virgin mary woulda blown that man and I am far from the virgin. I didn't stand a chance.
you better come over.. I need a witness to help prove the couch talks to me
When the people downstairs start talking about drugs, I second guess buying my drugs from them. Then I remember they are cheap and convenient.
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
Randomize
