If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
you're out of your mind
you look like daphne blake and he looks like fozzie bear
it's like he rubbed a lamp and wished you into existence
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I might have a beer. Just to keep this hangover on its toes.
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
she didnt realize that i was putting on the same condom i used the night before with some other girl
Why would I take you home? That would eliminate the chances of you making bad decisions I could ridicule you about later.
I like that you use a Disney movie to describe the starting of our BDSM relationship, lmao
He asked me while we were fishing why the passion was gone when we have sex. It's official...I am the dude in this relationship.
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Your penis caused this!
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