Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
you made cement angels. it was a great sight.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
I could literally track my booty calls if I ever got knocked up by my parking tickets
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
Man, jail baloney is awful.
hey you forgot your wet suit in my room you can come grab it whenever
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
Come get your sister, she's waving a shoe about and threatened to "teabag the Shit" out of the doorman because she can't check the shoe in.
Your clever response has earned you a blow job this week
Stop fucking Sharon's exes.
Sorry it took me so long to reply. I was fucking Sharon's ex.
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Your dick. My mouth. We have 20 minutes.
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
