god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
Spencer Pratt, I WILL beat the shit out of you someday, I Promise
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
He's doing his thing where I don't know if he's alive until three in the afternoon so idk
I had a drink called "the white nun." It tasted like Marshmallows, and celibacy.
I spent half an hour sculpting my pubes into a perfect triangle of really short hair, and the first thing he said when he saw it was "Don't you think you need a shave?"
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
what are you up to?
it's 8pm, i've already showered and gotten in bed. if you wanted to make plans u should have asked 3 months in advance
Randomize
