How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
this crazy girl in up in Dennys is going crazy because Bob Saget just texted her.
DUUUDE!! just found out that the fbi has a kids page. guess who's got a new jumior officer printout badge?
You are the patron saint of my drinking problem.
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
I think I've had 45 beers today though So things are looking up.
Question: would Brian be pissed if I brought his 17 year old sister as my date to the wedding?
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
There was a deer right in front of me when I came. Sex in the forest is awesome
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
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