So my boyfriend is on his way over and there is no time to wash the sheets from when I had his roommate over earlier. Put them in the dryer with a damp bounce sheet. Win?
This is a whole new level of slut for you....do they smell ok?
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
we found him in the shower with a bottle of jose saying "this is Mexico's fault"
I see you felt the need to carve your name in my kitchen table. thanks
while you laid on the ground I poured water into your mouth out of dog bowl some random guy walks by and said now that's what I like to see.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
to answer your questions bluetooth, 30ft, like a tampon, ask her, her idea, got tired of trying to find her in crowed clubs
The girl who comes up after me always strips to Lana Del Rey. I didn't think working in a strip club could be any more depressing.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
Randomize
