if you like me you must not know who I am
I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Wish i knew that 10 minutes ago when i told him to dance with my blackberry while i got another drink
Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
The only coherent words in the 6 texts i recieved were don't, cute, fucking, beer, and lions
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
Hey thanks again for rolling me that blunt necklace. It was amazing.
He drives a BMW. I have to fuck him. Girl Code Rule #26.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Every single person in NY is either baking, drinking, or photographing their cat. Reporting live from Instagram.
I'm at the nutcracker high as shit. It's so beautiful. I cried.
there is a guy with a glowstick staff outside my house
If only he'd realize the fondness I have for his genitals.
Wait. How did I get engaged last night?
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