The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Would love to except that I crashed into a hearse in a funeral procession about an hour ago so I think that pretty much put an end to my day.
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
I'm taking tokes in the bath tub, come if you want, I'm naked and you have to bring chicken nuggets or else you can't come in
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
I really don't know how I went from having a few drinks to waging war against ghosts in my apartment but here we are
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
She said my mask was creepy, took it off with her teeth, and proceeded to bite my neck. I love vampires.
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
In celebration of finishing my homework, lets drink tea w/ vodka
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