my best friend tried to rape me with a pineapple
physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
I kind of had a moment like that kid whose mom cancelled his WoW subscription, except I didn't try to shove a remote control up my own ass.
The more I sober up, the more sick I am/realize how weird dancing around a wine bottle was
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
I just put a tampon in while driving. Don't tell me I don't got skills.
Dude they are all farmers and I'm pretty sure there's a prostitute here.
My last google search was 'bulk asian wives' I don't know either
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey, i turned the toilet into a water fountain. Drink up.
Just burnt my nuts with a cigarette. Don't ask. I hate life.
My favorite thing about your netflix account "suggestions for you" section: Russias Toughest Prisons is followed immediately by Strange Sex
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I went to the strip club tonight. I had never gone, and in a panic I gave the dancer giving me a lap dance a handshake and introduced myself. Redefines business casual.
Your next boyfriend should be from MENSA...you're so smart, it's intimidating as fuck. My penis retracted in fear.
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