Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
We used a lit joint as a candle for her birthday cake
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You are going to come home to a suitcase in the fridge. Just go with it.
He was leaving the restaurant I was going to as I was parking. I didn't want to scream, "hey, didn't I jerk you off?" Out of my window at 10 am
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
I'm not the type to go to a guys house...in your case his boat...and sleep with them..I mean I have in the past but I'm trying to be more serious and grown up
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Randomize
