Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
Randomize
