I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
i think he was starting go for a boob grab when we both realized the middle of a public tennis court wasn't the place
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
Its kind of weird knowing that im only seeing you that day to fuck in some woods
The words "me," "sober," and "new years eve" do not go together. Ever.
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
I met his dad. Turns out he was a one nighter from the nurses conference in Vegas. Not sure how to handle this one.
Clearly, you already have. Both of them.
Kinda awkward to hear your aunt complain about loose women when you're in town to be a stunt dick for a swingers convention. Just sayin.
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
His dick is social distance approved
Social distance approved?
big enough for me to fuck from six feet away
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