Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
AHHHH!!! note to self never google image chastity belt omfg
I am drunk at a castle and it isn't even 3. Europe is amazing.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
You should get with him and swear you have to use lambskin condoms. That'll test his veganism.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
I'm not sure whom I'm texting but I put you in my phone as last nights fuck budy, and I'm just curious if I left my clutch with you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
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