I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
I have no idea. Next thing I know we're all down on one knee saying the pledge of allegiance and then singing I'm Proud to be an American. Then Trevor ate pizza off the sidewalk.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
My Instagram consists mostly of drag queens and people who dress up as power rangers... I'm pretty sure I'm an unclassified category of gay
I just got home and someone ate all my chicken nuggets. Bitches be asking for a death sentence?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
Was it you that ate my bacon or do I have to rip my roommate's face off?
My little sister just helped me edit my nudes so that's how my night is going
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
Here's the thing. Kinda drunk. Eating leftover soup. In bed. Watching Disney channel.
had to remind myself that killing him is not a good career move AGAIN.
Randomize
