"it" just moved
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Don't EVER smell your tampon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
I left a care package of Jack Daniel's, pancake mix and porn in your apartment. Merry fucking Christmas.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just crying my tits off and he was just sitting there listening. I was an open book of embarrassing life stories.
Wine is not your friend.
Xanax and full house Tuesday is now Percocet Sunday
You got stoned and bought $300 worth of pudding. Again! Why do YOU think she left you?
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Noted. Next time you want to get fried chicken and cocaine.
Ok. That just sounds baller.
Never let the horse trainer ride you, always ride the horse trainer. I have huge bruises on my thighs from his hip bones. That's how hard he rode me
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