? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
There was a suspicious looking plate that suggests I may have eaten salad with gravy
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
He's claiming he can open a beer bottle with anything. He's been trying for a while now with a power rangers action figure and he is just cutting the hell out of his hand. There is blood all over billy
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
You live 7 mins away and I'm leaving in 10 mins. At this point sex before work is impossible.
Challenge accepted. Be naked in 6 mins.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
The German just referred to my vagina as the Great Barrier Reef and that he was going to go diving in it.
Remind me to tell you the story of the fuzzy condom
Randomize
