The girl I brought home was really impressed with the pile of blow you were doing while watching "Intervention."
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
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Did we both pass out talking about cake last night?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
There's a hand-carved wooden bong in my backpack, and i really wish i could remember last night now.
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
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Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
This is true. I'm still having Jess write "no drugs" on my left hand and "except weed" on my right hand
How exactly does one go about seducing an older, possibly blind gentleman?
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
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