Stoned at DSW. SO MANY SHOES! THEY'RE FREAKING ME OUT.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
Sitting here wishing there were men in my life.
me too. too bad ive decided to fill that hole with cookie dough, closing the door to future men one fat cell at a time.
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
Lesson learned. Never get fingered on an airplane.
I'm missing some hair, but it's cool. Breadsticks are done.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
Lost my virginity dressed as catwoman. He was dressed as batman. Glad I waited.
Ummm, my mojito just spilled on 2 essays as I'm grading. Who says high schoolers have all the fun?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Randomize
