M and I are hungry and we are making your pizza in the fridge. But you're having sex and we're not so we dont feel bad.
I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
how in the hell can u get pulled over when ur car is parked.
My little brother got home at 4am too, we drunk ate together. It was a kodak moment.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
I've got a permanent seat at the "Girls who eat their feelings" table this weekend.
Did u know it's unconstitutional to turn down a shot during 4th of July celebrations.. Rest now dear liver
Pedi-lyte stocked
They are doing the auction. One of the items in the auction is a grenade launcher.
did you just send me my own nude
Pandora played an ad for a free trial for an abortion pill if you’ve had unprotected sex in the last 2-3 days and then Lucky came on... I literally am dying laughing
You were painting for six hours and managed one four foot wall. "The Mellow Handyman" isn't a good business model.
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