i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
two gay guys came in and bought just a kite and a box of wine. Why cant I have saturday nights that awesome
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Found a guy passed out on the coffee table with a thong duct taped from ear to ear.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
I spilled beer everywhere which led to an oil fire and me melting a spatula again. And then I was late to class so I explained what happened to the teacher.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
It's my birthday, if I want to stay home, get stoned and watch the gameshow network, that's what I'm going to do.
Just walked outside my house; realized I wasn't wearing any pants after about 3 minutes or so.
Drunk, high, hungover?
...I wish I had an excuse.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
I am at a cat party and I just witnessed people lapping vodka out of a bowl for a contest. Lol
Randomize