If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
he wouldn't shut up and let me sleep
yeah i got into a fight with my man last night
why can't men just shut up and put out?
It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
my boob sweat smells like rotting zombie flesh
is this your pickup line?
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
Oh my fucking god I saw the pictures. What the mother fucking fuck. Destroy the pictures. Destroy the fucking pictures.
Please confirm the destruction of the pictures. NOW.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Is it okay to send him a "thanks for the sexual awakening" note?
The only way I'll cross anything off my to do list today is if I write 'eat melted cheese' on it
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Every time Brady gets sacked I cum a little...
Y’all did coke off my Puff The Magic Dragon plate.😂
I need to align my fucking chakras
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
