He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
I'm sitting in the drive through at Mcdonalds right now watching the workers pressure wash the vomit I left from last night.
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
I just woke up to find the whole kitchen sick had been converted into a gravity bong.
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
Is it too early in the day to be getting dressed for the strip club?
I got wine drunk and bought a hedgehog
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
My ass is in a myriad of pain right now
Lesson learned - Taco Bell before a long night of BDSM is a BAD idea
He shit with the door open. I think that means we are in a realtionship.
The fact he has had a girlfriend for 5 years and they are trying to work it out isn’t going to stop me from sleeping with him. He said it himself you can’t cheat on someone you love...
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
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