just cut a line with my blood donor card...i feel like it will help remind me that i was once a productive member of society.
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
My spanish isn't great but I'm pretty sure he was calling me a "little monkey" while I was blowing him
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I thought my life was going to shit but then I read about Amanda Bynes and I realize it's not so bad
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just started an apology with "so I'm sorry about throwing the Brita at your head last night..."
I just found your shirt hanging in a tree 4 blocks from the party...in the opposite direction of your house. where are you going?
Ate a slug for 39 dollars
I wouldn't expect anything less from a PhD student
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Welcome aboard the S.S. struggle. I'll be your captain for today's voyage and Jeremy is your first mate. Just sit back and relax while we navigate the seas of drunken regret. Your forecast for the day is violently hungover with a chance of "shit, that really did happen!"
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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