I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
dude, i think we just came across a situation where tits weren't worth it.
Disregard that. She just puked into her boot and started screaming.
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
You were outside the bathroom the gay guy was puking in, screaming "IT GETS BETTER!" over and over again. Good message, poor execution.
Oh boy. Send him a care package with laxative cookies and alcohol. So he can shit himself while he's passed out drunk.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Is selling savings bonds for acid money something a normal person does?
Any time you've had a failed relationship, I blast No Sex for Ben by The Rapture and dance around my room. I wish I was joking.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Matt is trying to convince me that we have a deal where if I show him my tits he won't do cocaine. Apparently we shook hands on it?
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
Randomize
