I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
when i start to cry when i lose at mario kart is when you should put me to bed
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Im going in through the window and borrowing her dog. Dont worry ive done this before. we have an agreement.
My roommate comes home screaming, I brought you home a friend! I thought she brought me a guy...no, she brought home a one-eyed shih tzu.
Either I'm still drunk or the right side of the bed is now the left side.
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
This is my college life. Rolling at 4PM on a Wednesday to skrillex in the parking lot of a mexican restaurant.
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
I'm sitting here with a band aid on my labia, this is a first
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
