Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
Watching Miami Social reminded me of how much I miss snorting coke with burger king straws in a life guard hut on the beach until we noticed someone was drowning.
Did you save them?
Who?
I got to stop making out with my boss at work. I think we should just get it overwith, be dissaponted and move on.
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
Randomize
