new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
He was sitting on the bathroom floor, swirling his finger in the toilet singing the Laguna Beach theme song. I don't know whether to laugh or help him.
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I found our waiter on grindr, gave him my number, and got him to send a dick pic. Still not getting laid but close enough?
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
Randomize
