I told him I'm not paying rent anymore because he's seen my boobs.
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I have seen more male genitalia at this party tonight than I ever want to see again in my entire life.
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Porn. Physics. Porn. Icecream. Porn. That's my life now.
People dont know what to do when a naked fat guy is running towards them. they panic
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
I think I met my butt stuff soulmate
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
I woke up completely naked in a mint condition 71 chevelle in someones garage. What.
I'm just glad you didn't end up in Staten Island
I woke up naked holding a taco. My ass couldn't even make it to my bed let alone Staten Island
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