I'm so bored and have no one to sexy text
just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
it's like god just wants me to be high for five days in a row. keep the blizzards coming.
tip of the day : never have sex with a full bladder. it WILL lead to complications and a very unhappy partner.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
Is my lip ring still in your hair?
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
Did you pour a hundred fucking pounds of sand in my car last night?
lol... you weighed it?
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
Well, I ruined his toilet and he's still completely okay with me. Plus, it took him like a week to tell me.
If a girl I didn't love ruined my toilet I don't think I'd stick around.
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