I cheated on you last night. I slept with my laptop.
if this week's events in iraq have taught me anything, it's that when pulling out, always expect a mess...
What do you say about some mid-afternoon anal?
i wanted to tell my neighbors to shut up it was 4am, but listening to her rag on him for his minute man routine was actually entertaining
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I drove to my yoga class while eating a piece of bacon. Wow. I see myself in a whole new light.
I mean, once you help another girl drunker than you zip her jeans you can't help but be friends after that
I have a surprise for you
Is it drugs? I want drugs. Or a puppy!
My main goal for tomorrow night is to make it back into my own bed
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
My FitBit tracked the calories I burned during sex. Hello 2015!
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
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