Just spent the rest of my time at that bar trying to keep a probs underage closet gay from touching my kitten to prove he still likes girls.
That's why girls suck all the time. Blah blah nag nag drama drama buy me things but I won't touch your penis
I am so fucking pissed, there are no Shamwows in the As Seen on TV Store.
Looks like you'll have to stick to jizzing in socks.
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
Even tho I saw his penis. He is still a really nice guy.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
You just kept insisting that you and the homeless man went way back, and that you bonded over how cold you both were.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
He should be castrated
Nah he might accidentally come while they're cutting it off. Wouldn't be fair to the surgeons
I mayyyyy have moaned a name that wasn't his
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
Randomize
