it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Why did that cocktail waitress get to sleep with Tiger for 2 years, and all I ever got for living in Whorelando for five years is a couple of pictures with Joey Fatone
I'd say this is worse than that time when I realized that my favorite bath toy growing up was my Mom's douche bottle.
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
So our bartender was in the bathroom the same time I was so I ordered a beer mid stream.....is that weird?
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
I burned my tit while he banged me and it was still the best kitchen sex EVER!!!
I woke up to rachel asking "did anyone else fall out of a tree last night?"
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
Randomize
