One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
you just broke rule number 1. If you can't lift her up don't date her
He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
he doesn't drink and he's an emt - he'll be our dd for nye in exchange for a threesome tomorrow afternoon.
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
The last thing I remember before blacking out was telling Jamie that she was too fat even for my standards. The first thing I remember after blacking out was waking up next to her.
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Please stop hiding condoms in my house. If I want to have sex with you, I will let you know. FYI, my mom found the ones hidden behind the milk. She was not happy.
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
You know it's NBA season when you compare head to 3 pointers.
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
