there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
She is currently drunk and caressing my professor's face with one hand.
I'm worried because he hasn't removed it.
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
My mom legitimately hired a private eye on me. DO YOU KNOW HOW EXCITING MY LIFE JUST GOT???
It's not your birthday unless mom picks you up at the bar
Remember when I got punched in the face on NYE last year? I don't
I think all three of us just need to suck it up and go to lunch with him to keep our bar tab down
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
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