I just remembered I gave a homeless man a ride to his bridge last night.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
He was visibly upset that you'd rather eat nachos than have sex with him.
It's one of those nights that you wish to god someone would booty call you, and then realize you'll just be stuck here with your poptart...
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
It's blow job season.
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
Some guy is here using a taser on people. I'm up next
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
My husband was abducted by a group of disco dancers in the parde and danced off down the street. If you see him, tell him to Hustle on home and clean the cat box. #MardiGras
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
The shrooms were awesome. Everyone's bones in their face looked so beautiful! Everyone had great face structures.
Randomize