HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
Needing to keep one leg on the floor during sex so you dont spin should qualify for some kind of drunk award.
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
I told you he wasn't attractive.
Do you think I cared? I was wiping myself with a scarf..
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
When the dude you brought home from the bar on Thanksgiving leaves before you wake up ... #thankful
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
She handed me scissors and told me that they were the ones with the lowest probability of having been used to trim someone's pubes.
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize
