i don't remember her name, but i don't need it unless we decide to hook up again. but even then, i can get away with not knowing it for a while. it's not like we have actual conversations.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
You know your in college when you decide house chores with games of beer pong...
Mmmhmmm sure, nice try, but there's certain wounds that only bj's can heal
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
... why is there a bottle of pee on my headboard?
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
My makeup bag looks like it has lips and wants to sing to me... Too high?
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
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