Well douche your snatch and let's go!
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
Found the puke drawer
She said we couldnt stop drinking until there were enough bottles to make a fort. so we could have sex in our "bottle castle"
dude, i warned you that using a card to pay for my hotel room was a bad idea. You deserve the extra $600 in cleaning fees
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Randomize
