Is it a bad thing I remember to take my birth control when I stumble across guys I've had sex with on facebook?
He just went up to bed, still drunk from last night, carrying a pear, a pipe, and an unopened bottle of wine. I think he'll be fine.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
when she first told me she hooked up with him my initial response was to shout "WE HAVE SOMETHING IN COMMON!"
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
I'm trying to pinpoint the moment when "don't do anything I wouldn't do" became bad advise.
You were being mean. And telling everyone to suck your six inch strap on. People were not pleased
Please be lying.
Im not. Your family was creeped out
After we won I just ran all over campus for a couple hours. Then made out with a guy on a bench
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
I want falafel more than sex right now. That's really saying something for me...
No problem...what are friends for if they can't rub eachothers genitals.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
