and my herpes radar will keep us safe
susan atkins died, charles manson's lady
dont cry, there are other serial killers to crush on.
Can't a girl send out a 4 pm booty call anymore
Drunk me cleaned my room for me. Needless to say our relationship has improved greatly
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
woke up in a random sweater in a random bed in a random house on a street I don't recognize..
also, I vaguely remember swapping shirts with some random guy on the dance floor.
The inside of my nose has felt like the guy's face falling off from raiders of the lost ark all week
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
She's going to be the first to die of too much illness. Not even super bad stuff like cancer but like for having a cold at the same time as a sore throat and chlamydia or something. Just too much diseases.
The holidays are too long. I always run out of adderall before I run out of family. you got any left?
I needed to bring way more fireball to class to match this professors intensity
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
Randomize
